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SQ2 Deaths

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Regions in which Roger may die

Note: in this game, you are asked to input a name. Roger Wilco is the default name, and in all the messages below, "Roger Wilco" will be replaced with the name you put in.

General MessagesEdit

Another senseless tragedy. You can help prevent this. Vote yes on Lobotomies for Adventure Game Designers. Thank you for playing Space Quest II, Roger Wilco. You've been most entertaining.

It has been a pleasure watching you play Space Quest II.

Thanks for playing. You've been very entertaining.

Way to go, wing nut! Once again you've demonstrated your inability to sustain life. You quickly glance around the room to see if anyone saw you blow it. Thank you for playing Space Quest II, Roger Wilco. You've been swell to watch. Have a nice day.

Xenon Orbital Station Edit

Type "cheat" at any point in the game.Edit

Although not an actual "death", in version 2.0F this will end the game right away, give you a score of 255 out of a possible 250 and reward you with a message that says "Congratulations!! You're the most bitchen adventure game player in the World! No, make that the entire Universe!! While all those other silly saps struggle and toil through puzzle after puzzle, you have found a way to cheat yourself to the end. Is America great, or what?!" Obviously, a quick end isn't what you paid your money for.  

Walk off the starting screen platform edge. Edit

Roger floats off into the void of space.

Due to an obvious lack of common sense you have stepped off the edge, lost your magnetic grip of the ship, and drifted to your death.

Leave the locker room before removing the EVA suit. Edit

Boss: You've got a lot of nerve coming in here with your EVA suit on, Roger Wilco! That's the last straw. Turn in your mop. YOU'RE FIRED!

Well, Roger Wilco, you certainly didn't get off to a very good start. Better luck next shift.

Keep up the good work, Roger Wilco.

Walk off the edge of the station's yellow elevator. Edit

Roger plummets to his doom.

You're into the game barely 3 minutes and already you've nimbly stepped to your death. How far down your family tree did knuckles last play an important role in locomotion? Watch your step next time.

Labion Edit

Walk into the concealed pit on the starting screen. Edit

Roger falls down a pit to his doom.

Aaaghh! You fall to the bottom of a concealed pit. You might have survived the fall had you not come in contact with the several 30 centimeter long spikes planted vertically along the bottom of the pit.

Go right from the starting screen and approach the mushrooms. Edit

Roger gets sucked up by a mushroom, which "smiles."

Holy geez, boy! That mushroom thing sucked you clean up! You can't move a muscle nor see a speck of light.

You begin feeling waves of tingling, warmth, and moisture. Suddenly it's not so bad in here. Wow. Check out the colors, dude.

Your body and mind enjoy the short-lived buzz that is a side effect of the lethal poison you now marinate in. You are oblivious to the end. Not a bad way to go, actually.

But it sure is early in the game. I had high hopes for you. They said, "Who? Roger Wilco? Not a chance! That chump won't last twenty minutes!"

I said "No way! Roger Wilco isn't THAT lame!" So anyway, don't make ME look stupid TOO.

Go north of the starting screen and get caught by a guard. Edit

You hear something. It sounds not unlike the hovercraft you wrecked in.

A hovercraft appears, and the guard on it vaporizes Roger.

Drats! Vohaul's troops have tracked you down and passed sentence for your escape. Tough luck, eh?

Go north of the starting screen and climb the tree. (CLIMB TREE) Edit

Roger climbs the tree and gets stuck to it.

This is as uncool as uncool can be. It looks like you've adhered yourself to this tree like a fly to fly paper. And speaking of insects, here comes a swarm now.

A swarm of insects covers Roger and reduces him to a skeleton while "Flight of the Bumblebee" plays.

You'll be proud to know that you have filled today's nutritional requirements for many of the local carnivorous insects. Adventuring is not always pretty.

Step on one of the root monster's roots. Edit

Roger gets ensnared in the root, then devoured by the monster.

Good. You've succeeded in establishing contact with one of this planet's life forms, and it looks like you'll get to examine it up close and personal. The giant root-looking thing is giving you a guided tour of its digestive system.

What you experience next is too horrible to describe. Let's just say that you die as a result. You are dead. Trust me.

It may please you to know that, during the night, you didn't digest well. For a while, gastric distress made it extremely unpopular with the other root monsters.

Swim in the swamp without repelling the swamp monster. Edit

A tentacle wraps around Roger, dragging him under the water.

You feel something slimy clamp down on your leg and pull you beneath the surface! You struggle in vain to free yourself. Unfortunately, your desire to breathe results in the intake of a large quantity of swamp water. If the lack of oxygen hadn't killed you the taste of the putrid water would have.

You're dead. Better luck next time, Roger Wilco.

Dive in the swamp or cave without holding a breath. (DIVE) Edit

You can't go on. You do not have enough oxygen in your lungs. You panic! The need for oxygen causes you to become irrational.

Your desire for air causes you to inhale large quantities of water, which results in suffocation.

Roger floats, limp and dead, in the water.

Walk into the chasm. Edit

Roger falls into the chasm and plummets to his doom.

You smoothly step off the edge of the fissure. Gravity has its way with you and you are sucked to the depths of the fissure at a very high rate of speed. Needless to say, you hit the bottom and your mortal remains are redimensioned to the point where life is no longer an option. Will you never learn?

Climb onto the log bridge after creating it, then move up or down. Edit

Roger loses his balance on the log and plummets to his doom.

Being less than careful, you lose your balance and slide off the log. Gravity has its way with you and you are sucked to the depths of the fissure at a very high rate of speed. Needless to say, you hit the bottom and your mortal remains are redimensioned to the point where life is no longer an option.

Call the hunter (type CALL HUNTER twice) then wait. Edit

The hunter seems to ignore you.

The hunter stands and takes a long look in your direction. His face, though strange in its own right, bears an expression one might see on a freak show patron. He moves closer.

Roger is punched by the hunter, then dragged over to the fire, lashed to a branch, and roasted.

The hunter has decided that it's a perfect day for a barbecue. As he slowly turns you over the fire, you begin to turn a beautiful golden brown. Death follows at an agonizingly long distance.

Throw the spore at the hunter, then call him over. (THROW SPORE) Edit

Upon impact with the ground, the spore opens and spews its dust into the air. The hunter falls to the ground paralyzed.

You have caused the guard to be paralyzed. I don't think he's too pleased with you.

Roger is punched by the hunter, then dragged over to the fire, lashed to a branch, and roasted.

The hunter has decided that it's a perfect day for a barbecue. As he slowly turns you over the fire, you begin to turn a beautiful golden brown. Death follows at an agonizingly long distance.

Go north of the hunter's camp and wait. Edit

A hovercraft takes off from a landing pad visible in the distance, then arrives, and the guards on top vaporize Roger.

Drats! Vohaul's troops have tracked you down and passed sentence for your escape. Tough luck, eh?

Go north of the hunter's camp and walk off the cliff. Edit

Roger steps off the cliff and plummets to his doom.

Way to go, pathfinder! As you plunge towards the base of the cliff, "Mommy!" escapes your lips.

In the remake this death text was changed to "Gravity sucks."

Return to the screen where the hunter's snare was and walk off the upper-left corner edge. Edit

Roger steps off the edge and plummets to his doom.

Intrigued with gravity, you take another terminal ride to solid ground. Watch your step, Roger Wilco.

Tie the rope to the tree stump then climb down it. (TIE ROPE TO STUMP, CLIMB ROPE, move down the rope) Edit

You head over the edge and down the rope.

The tree stump gives way, and it, the rope, and Roger plummet into the chasm.

It looks like that stump wasn't a good thing to tie on to.

Take too long to jump off the rope while swinging. Edit

Roger gets snagged by the monster.

He who hesitates is lost. You gave that guy one chance too many and he seized the opportunity, not to mention you. You are consumed in two quick bites.

Slide too far down the rope. Edit

Roger reaches the end of the rope and plummets to his doom.

You reach the end of the rope. This has a negative effect on your resistance to the urging of gravity.

Let go of the rope while too far away to jump to the ledge. Edit

Your timing causes you to jump when the rope is at its least helpful point. Gravity beckons.

Roger lets go of the rope, falls short of the ledge, and plummets to his doom.

Due to the unyielding nature of solid ground, especially when struck from 50 meters, you now bear the dimensions of a manhole cover.

Walk off the ledge. Edit

Roger steps off the ledge and plummets to his doom.

You carelessly step from the ledge to the bottom of the fissure. As should be expected from such a stupid stunt, you die.

Walk through the ledge cave without a light source. Edit

You hear the sound of many small, scratchy footsteps moving toward you!

Owww!

GNASH!

GROWL!

CRUNCH!

SNAP!

You have just been felled by a killer Labion Cave Beaver! You now know the meaning of excruciating when used in reference to level of pain.

Walk through the canyon before saving the pink alien. Edit

Roger is stoned by the Pinkunz.

Yow! These guys seem to dislike you intensely. Using slings and very hard and sharp rocks, they have reduced you to a battered corpse.

Take too long to produce a light source in the cave maze. Edit

Suddenly, an inhuman guttural moan echoes through the narrow caves. You're not sure which direction it came from. The only thing you do know for sure is that you've just soiled your undergarment.

Yuck! A horrible aroma permeates the air. The sounds of suction and slithering reverberate throughout the tunnel.

Oh, crud! The warm and inviting feel of suction cup laden tentacles encompasses you. A sharp, probing pain is your introduction to death.

From the cave maze start, go down, right, down, right, down, right, up, left, up, left, right. Edit

Suddenly an inhuman guttural moan echoes through the narrow caves. You're not sure which direction it came from. The only thing you do know for sure is that you've just soiled your undergarment.

The Labion Cave Squid appears and devours Roger.

Oh, my. Now you know why they wanted to close the hole behind you. You have become the unwilling victim of the dreaded Labion Cave Squid! Tough luck.

Swim in the underground river for too long. Edit

You grow quite weary swimming against the currents.

Roger sinks into the water.

You can no longer continue swimming due to exhaustion. You slip beneath the surface.

Choose the wrong direction at the fork in the river. Edit

Roger gets caught in the river undertow and is pulled over a waterfall.

Roger: AAUGGH!

SPLAT!

After caroming off of a pair of rock outcroppings, you find a final resting place at the base of the falls.

Get caught by the Labion Terror Beast. Edit

Roger gets caught in the Labion Terror Beast's tornado and is shredded.

Well, ain't that a hoot. That guy reduced you to a multi-colored mound of cole slaw-like matter. Better than a Murphco Slice-O-Matic. You are dead, however.

Get discovered by the platform guard. (Walk into the open or THROW ROCK) Edit

The guard vaporizes Roger.

Dang. Allowing the guard to observe you was not very swift. He has disassembled you, probably adding a little excitement to his otherwise dull day.

Sneak underneath the platform, trick the guard into leaving by calling out (CALL GUARD) or throwing a rock (THROW ROCK), then follow him once he's gone. Edit

Strolling south you run into the guard from the tower. He doesn't seem to appreciate your comments regarding today's weather.

BANG!

It was pretty dumb to follow a non-friend bearing a lethal weapon. As you should have expected, he still desired you non-functional. Keep trying, Roger Wilco.

Call out to the platform guard. (CALL GUARD) Edit

You call out a universal expletive.

The guard vaporizes Roger.

The being fires in the general direction of the sound. Unfortunately, that happens to be where you are. You know the rest.

Throw the rock at the guard unassisted. (THROW ROCK AT GUARD) Edit

You throw the rock in the direction of the guard. Unfortunately, it falls well short of its target. The guard responds by firing in the direction he thought it came from.

The guard vaporizes Roger.

Doesn't that bite!?. The guard caught a glimpse when you chucked the rock and, with impressive accuracy, wasted you.

Walk off the top of the platform. Edit

Roger walks off the platform and plummets to his doom.

After surviving to this point, you are still prone to acts typical of the mentally absent.

Go back down the elevator after reaching the top of the platform. Edit

You head back down to the lower level. Unfortunately, you are met by an armed guard. You have been quite a headache. To make it up to them, you are strung between two hovercraft. On the command "GO", life leaves you (in two different directions).

Power up the shuttle, set the attitude dial to VAC, turn on the thrusters, then move the throttle in the wrong direction. Edit

Because you are terminally weak above the shoulders, you guide the ship into the ground.

Vohaul's Asteroid Edit

Fall off one of the starting screen's ledges. Edit

Roger steps off the ledge and plummets to his doom.

It's a short step to the end of the game for you. You're no Buddy Ebsen.

Fall off one of the ledges near the elevators. Edit

Roger steps off the ledge and plummets to his doom.

Smooth move, Exlax! You now know that artificial gravity can be equally effective as natural gravity. Due to the long fall and sudden stop your body has become a two-dimensional object. You're dead, of course.

Go down the stairs from the starting screen, get trapped, and wait. Edit

The door behind you closes solidly!

A barrier springs up before you!

Another barrier stands in your way!

You feel the floor shift below you! It's moving to the left!

Roger falls into the acid and is dissolved.

Imagine, if you will, taking a bath in sulphuric acid and using pumice for a washcloth. After that bit of displeasure passes, it gets much worse as the acid slowly eats its way to the last critical organs. Finally, mercifully, death takes you.

Slip off the plunger after sticking it too early. Edit

Using formerly uncharacteristic creativity, you apply the suction cup-like plunger to the smooth metal finish and hang on for dear life! Once a janitor, always a janitor!

You can hang on no longer. Your grip weakens...

Roger loses his grip on the plunger and falls into the acid.

Imagine, if you will, taking a bath in sulphuric acid and using pumice for a washcloth. After that bit of displeasure passes, it gets much worse as the acid slowly eats its way to the last critical organs. Finally, mercifully, death takes you.

Get too close to the cage with the furry fists around the bars. Edit

A giant furry fist smashes Roger.

Youch! You feel alarmingly dense!

Apparently, you were a prime focal point for some aggression channeling by one of the caged creatures. Your compressed composition indicates that your attacker possesses considerable strength, a good guy to avoid in the future.

Of course, you are damaged beyond repair and the game must end. You've made quite a bit of progress, though. Don't start screwing up now.

In the remake, the caged creature knocks Roger's head off. The word "dence" is replaced with "lightheaded", and the word "compressed" is replaced with "headless".

Get caught by the floor waxer. Edit

Roger is run over by the floor waxer and is flattened.

It looks like you have been formally introduced to the floor waxer. You now consist of a very thin, yet glossy floor covering. Too bad. You seemed to be making relatively good progress.

Get kissed by the Spiny Alien Thang then continue with the game. Edit

Oh, no! One of the cells is opening. Who knows what unspeakable horror waits behind those steel bars?

The Spiny Alien Thang kisses Roger.

OH, YUCK!! The dark and spiny beast with massive red lips grabs you up and, after a longing glance, proceeds (don't read further if the phrase "French kiss" bothers you) to plant a very moist french kiss on you. You are left quite stunned.

You are suddenly wracked by excruciatingly violent pain! It feels as if your body is trying to turn inside-out.

Roger writhes in pain until a green alien bursts out of his chest, hopping away and leaving Roger's dead body behind.

After gaining freedom from its flesh fortress, the odd little alien runs away leaving you lying on the floor like a used, over-sized placenta. A darn tough, yet unique, way to go. That should teach you not to be sucking face with alien beings in the future.

Use the lighter while in the bathroom. (USE LIGHTER) Edit

Vohaul's Asteroid Fortress explodes.

Well Roger Wilco, I guess you'll be paying methane a little more respect in the future. If Mr. Science were here, he would have explained that open flame and high concentrations of methane gas don't mix. Since you're dead you'd best get to restoring.

Get caught by a wallbot. Edit

You have made the mistake of getting within what looks to be a cattle-prod's length of the metal menace.

An electrical contact connected to an extension arm reaches from its body and makes contact with you. That's when you begin feeling the intense burst of electrical current pulsing through your body. You quickly black out.

The wallbot electrocutes Roger.

As you can see, you amount to little more than a hill of laser-fried beans. You've come a long way only to be torched. Keep up the fine work.

Get caught by a wallbot while setting off the sprinkler system. Edit

You have made the mistake of getting within what looks to be a cattle-prod's length of the metal menace.

An electrical contact connected to an extension arm reaches from its body and makes contact with you. That's when you begin feeling the intense burst of electrical current pulsing through your body. You quickly black-out.

The wallbot electrocutes Roger.

While receiving a nice hosing yourself, the basket fire is extinguished. Seconds later a loud series of pops is followed by the smell of fried electronics.

Unfortunately, it's too late for you!

The sprinklers sense accomplishment and cease operation.

As you can see, you amount to little more than a hill of laser-fried beans. You've come a long way only to be torched. Keep up the fine work.

Fall off the console while miniaturized. Edit

Roger steps off the console and plummets to his doom.

You now know for a fact that less weight does not equal less pain at the onset of deceleration trauma. You've come so far only to die in a dumb way. What a geek.

Take too long to escape from the glass container. Edit

Roger writhes and gasps for air, then flops over and dies.

A serious lack of oxygen causes you to black out and eventually die. Too bad Vohaul didn't see fit to punch some air holes for you. That's all for now, Roger Wilco.

Walk to the keyboard before getting rid of Vohaul. Edit

Vohaul's fist pulverizes Roger.

Darn, Roger Wilco. I guess His Lardness got a little fed up with your meddling. You've been redesigned once again revealing a permanent overhead view. You resemble one of those wonderfully colorful mosaics commonly found on windshields.

Type REDUCE on the keyboard then re-enter the jar. Edit

Roger is reminiaturized, becoming too small to exist.

By already being in a miniaturized form and setting the beam to reduce, you are now too small to exist. That wasn't too swift on your part. Too bad.

Fall off Vohaul's ledge or his stairs. Edit

Roger plummets to his doom.

Well, Roger Wilco, you've found one more way to snatch humiliation from the jaws of heroism.

Get rid of Vohaul then fail to stop the salesmen launch. Edit

The Launch Countdown hits 00:00.

Bad news, Roger Wilco. The clone launch has progressed flawlessly. Life is now hopeless, your civilization doomed. There is no need to go on.

Go too far down the glass walkway before putting on the oxygen mask. Edit

A section of the glass tubing has fractured from combined stress. The pressurized atmosphere rushes for the relative vacuum of space.


Roger writhes and gasps for air, then flops over and dies.

Due to the effect of the air rushing by you to get out the hole, the air in your lungs is sucked out and you find it impossible to get more. Hence you struggle, but die. You only had 228 points anyway. No big loss.

Get rid of Vohaul then take too long to escape the asteroid. Edit

"40 MINUTES UNTIL MELTDOWN," a synthesized voice cheerfully announces.

Synthesized voice: 1 MINUTE LEFT. IT'S BEEN NICE KNOWING YOU.

More bad news, Roger Wilco. The asteroid's orbit has finally decayed to the point where contact with the molecular contents of Labion's upper atmosphere has been achieved.

The result of this friction is a tremendous heat build-up. Despite being a very dense chunk of matter, the asteroid flames out, broiling you with it. Another victim in the heartless universe of adventure.

Get caught by Vohaul's Marrow-Matic robot. Edit

Any curiosity you may have harbored regarding the menacing, metallic pest will now be satisfied as you have drawn too close. Your attention is attracted to a decal on the front of the machine. It says "The Vohaul Marrow-Matic". This rouses your curiosity.

Suddenly you note that each and every bone in your body feels as though it has been transformed into molten matter. Never slow to catch on, you notice that you are cooking from the inside out! Now this is a pain that lingers!

Roger is disintegrated by the Marrow-Matic.

Every drop of moisture is purged from your system by the intense heat of the internal barbecue. Your dehydrated composition makes it impossible to continue. Better luck next time, Roger Wilco.

Escape Pod Edit

Wait until the air runs out. Edit

Suddenly, a warning signal draws your attention to the oxygen meter on the front panel. It reads low and dropping fast!

This is just great! You knew it was all too good to be true. You have, maybe, five minutes of air left. Well, Roger Wilco, it was nice knowing you.

Sorry. You've run out of oxygen and are now dead. Your death is a lonely event occurring in an utterly desolate setting. Alone in the knowledge that you have spared Xenon an incredibly horrible fate, you now must deal with the down side of self-sacrifice.


Total number of ways to die: 56

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