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Back of BookEdit
The Two Guys from Andromeda's latest sci-fi comedy, SPACE QUEST IV, will give you hours of frustration unless you have this hintbook. Want to know how to get the dog into the hanging basket? Want to find out how to attach the melon? Buy this hintbook and it all becomes obvious. You'll hit your head and say, "Boy, how stupid could I have been? A moron could've figured this out. I must be a real dimwit, a pathetic nimnal, a wretched, idiotic excuse for a human being not to have figured out these simple puzzles in the first place." Try it and see!
- I'm in a long tunnel with a light visible at the far end. What should I do?
- The wound where the Tentacled Venomite ripped my larynx out keeps getting infected. Help!
- Have you been picking at it again? That'll only make it worse.
- Have you found the iodine dispenser?
- Have you found the bottle of peroxide?
- Have you found the Salt Shaker?
- Mix the iodine into the peroxide and shake some salt on it. Apply the mixture to the wound. Scrape yourself off the ceiling and get on with the game.
- I can't seem to find the one-armed man anywhere.
- I can't hear what the two guys at the bar are saying.
- Have you tried typing LISTEN TO MEN?
- Oh, that's right, this is a parserless game. Click the EAR icon on the men.
- Oh, that's right, there's no EAR icon. Click the EYE icon on the men.
- That didn't help either, did it? Did you think it would?
- Just fooling! There's NO WAY to hear what they're saying. That'll teach you to read ahead in this hint book!
- Strawberry is to sky as fire engine is to...
- I'm in the stupid timepod. Where else can I go?
- Where do you think?
- Someplace where the sun don't shine.
- Ulence Flats if you had the coordinates.
- When I try to splice the vidlink cable to the Venusian Holo-Mat, I end up irradiating myself with deadly plutonium. What do I do now?
- Good question. So far, our best solution is to seal yourself in a 50x50ft. block of concrete.
- Then bury yourself at least 1500 feet deep, preferably in an unpopulated, undeveloped area.
- Avoid salt mines or areas where corrosion may breach the concrete.
- Try not to talk to or touch anybody or anything for the next 50,000 years.
- There's a large, slimy creature blocking the door to the custodian's room in the Magmethean building.
- That's not even a question.
- Okay, how do I get past the large, slimy creature blocking the door to the custodian's room in the Magmethean building?
- What do you think he's waiting for?
- He's undoubtedly waiting for a custodian.
- If he wants a custodian, he probably needs some of that awful pine-scented sawdust.
- GIVE PINE-SCENTED SAWDUST TO CREATURE.
- I've got the book on running the Suborbital Surrey. What do I do with it?
- This one's easy. READ it!
- Make note of any particularly important features and events.
- Did you enjoy the book? Why or why not? Explain your answer, giving examples from the text. Be brief.
- I'm in a strange room inside the Super Computer. Scary eyeball-looking things stare at me. Bio-mechanical bones liven up the area nicely. How do I get the door open?
- Help! I've fallen, and I can't get up!
- We'll call your family and the hospital right away, Mrs. Fletcher.
- I've just started the game, and I've got the ampule of Megahol-256, the wad of chewing tobacco, and the open can of Classic DNA. What now?
- "What now?" What more did you want?
- Have you tried inhaling the Megahol-256?
- Have you tried chewing the wad of tobacco?
- Have you tried sipping some Classic DNA?
- Gosh, those didn't work. Put the tobacco and the ampule into the can and shake. Go to the room with the defibrillator, pour the mixture into it and go three screens to the left. After the explosion, go back into the room and take the ID chip from the dead guard. Get into the pod, go to the Horse's Asteroid, fight the security drones and put the ID chip into the 2nd Servobooth. Climb into the SubSystem computer and use the LaSerraSp to access the vector panel. Cut the green and lavender wires and step back. You win. Congratulations!
- I install the game as per instructions and the game freezes up. What am I doing wrong?
- Your computer is too cold. Make sure your thermostat is set above 32 degrees.
- Is there a fix available for this? I walk into the first room and get the message, "Oops! You tried something we didn't think of."
- Oops! You asked something we didn't think of.
- My computer has a 5.25" drive and this game comes in 3.5" only. How can I get a bigger disk?
- So far, there are no good methods. Don't fall for ads depicting miracle methods such as "pumps," hormone pills or injections. Your best bet is to tell yourself that it's not the size that counts. Oh, wait, did you say DISK?
Behind the scenesEdit
- The implied questions in the description don't actually appear in the hintbook.
- The "Help! I've fallen, and I can't get up!" hint is a reference to the Life Call ads
- Ovaltine is a brand of chocolate mix.
- The Jaws of Life are a device used by rescue crews to open the doors of wrecked cars to rescue people trapped inside.
- Poltergeist is a horror movie.
- One of the questions refers to different sizes of floppy disks. This game was originally released on the smaller floppy disk. At the time, computers still used floppies of both sizes.
- The one-armed man, Kimble, and Bob are references to the television series Twin Peaks and The Fugitive, both of which featured one-armed men.
- The fact that Roger has to use a hint book for the game he's in is a fourth wall break